From a Cluttered Desk

I am Tammy Cardwell, she of the cluttered desk. (Hey, you think I'm kidding?!) I'm having a blast here in Blogland and invite to you to peruse my ramblings. Like a buffet, they offer variety - essentially whatever makes it to the top of the piles that sometimes clutter my brain. We'll eventually cover it all - homeschooling, God, our church, the Eclectic Homeschool Online, books I'm writing and publishing, conferences I speak at, the joys of grandmotherhood, and hopefully chocolate. Of course, this is only what's near the top now. Who knows what's in those piles?

Yep, it’s time for more real world observations based on what I’m seeing in my mall job.

It seems to me that most of today’s teens really don’t "get" the job market. I’m not sure what they’re thinking. Or, more to the point, I"m not sure what the people who are supposedly preparing them for life in the real world are thinking. There was a discussion on one of my homeschool lists recently. It started when a mom asked for suggestions she could give her daughter for her job hunt and it got really interesting. Apparently what I’m seeing in our store is pretty normal.

For instance (Teens, take note!) in a recent conversation with my manager there were certain things she told me to watch for, to take note of, when people came in to turn in applications. Yes, believe it or not, the person who may or may not hire you is watching you even this early! If you want to impress from the very first, be DRESSED APPROPRIATELY even when you just come to fill out or turn in (or, yes, request) a job application - and I mean be dressed appropriately by THE BUSINESS’ DEFINITION, not your own. Believe me, there is often a huge difference between what you consider appropriate and what your employer considers appropriate. A general rule is to dress as well as the employees on the floor (or in the office) are dressed. Appearance is one of the big things my boss looks for, for many reasons. It’s enormously important in the interview, but yes, she’s even watching for it before then.

Some more helpful suggestions…

If you’re walking through the mall, filling out job applications as you go, BRING YOUR OWN PEN; not having a pen with you when you’re specifically in the process of filling out job applications is a sign that you did not prepare. And, though it seems silly to have to say this, BE POLITE for heaven’s sake. Don’t think you can get away with being rude to the employee taking your application, because you won’t; the instant the manager hears about it you may well be disqualified on the grounds of stupidity.

And then there’s the interview. As I said before, dressing appropriately is one of the biggest indicators of an applicant’s potential. Face it, if you don’t know enough to dress in a way that indicates an understanding of the role of the employee now, there is every chance you DON’T understand the role of the employee and won’t make a good one. (Think that’s judgmental? Well, accept it. The person interviewing you has only a few minutes to make a decision about you and there are certain things they’ll be looking for whether you think those things matter or not.)

I’m not a professional interviewer, of course, only someone who pays attention. Here’s a snippet from an email that came through in that homeschool list discussion I mentioned earlier. This lady was a manager who did her share of interviews.

The biggest thing you can do is have them PROPERLY dressed, enter the store and ask to speak to manager. If they introduce themselves in proper attire, not shorts, piercings and flip flops, it catches a manager’s attention. Also, when they begin interviewing, teach your daughter to dress and act appropriately.

During my interviews of teens at Hollywood, here are some situations I encountered. This is not a forward, these things actually happened.

I took restroom break between interviewing – friend of applicant knocked on restroom door to ask how long I would be so he could tell his friend

Teen came in after surfing, without changing clothes or brushing hair

Girl texted her friends ( interview was only 5 minutes)

Girl showed up in halter shirt, short skirt and flip flops, chewing gum.

Guy’s friend opened door to ask friend where they were going afterwards.

Guy wore his “grill” and rapper get-up, and spoke in “rap”.

Public school kids are not taught how to handle job interviews… don’t know where the parents are, but this is a chance for your child to really shine.
HTH

In case it’s not patently obvious, the incidents she lists here are examples of ways NOT to handle yourself at a job interview.

Celebrating Jesus!
Tammy C

It’s Friday or Saturday evening, you’re working your shift in your store at the mall, and you are besieged by group after group of unattended children who come into your store, play with the products, open things that aren’t meant to be opened, spray things that aren’t meant to be sprayed, use things that aren’t meant to be used, break things that certainly aren’t meant to be broken…

Did you catch what I said? I said unattended CHILDREN.

When I was in the 6th grade, maybe eleven years old, our parents would occasionally (VERY rarely) drop my sister and me off at the movie theater, or perhaps the local strip center for a couple of hours so we could do our Christmas shopping without them looking. To this day, I don’t know if they really left us there or only pretended to leave. Regardless, that was about thirty years ago…okay, more than thirty years ago. When my kids were eleven, dropping them off anywhere and leaving them unattended was completely out of the question; the world was already too unsafe a place.

So what in the world are the parents of these children - I mean kids who to me look like they can’t be more than nine or ten years old - THINKING?! I thought it was my imagination, that surely all of these kids couldn’t really be running around the mall on their own, with no parents at least a few stores down with cell phones firmly in hand. I’ve been educated, however, and I’m seriously shocked. From what I’ve been told, these large numbers of unattended children have actually become an issue with our local mall. If I was told correctly, mall security has recently been calling parents to come pick up some of these kids.

Right… Parents drop these ridiculously young kids off, whether it’s for a movie or whatever, and GO HOME, trusting that, though terrible things do happen to other people’s unattended children, of course such things would never ever happen to their own.

I’m blown away. I’m completely astounded.

Celebrating Jesus!
Tammy C

It’s been a while since I’ve written a work-inspired post, but I’m doing it tonight, because I saw that one more buggy and gritted my teethe that one too many times.

You know those buggies that Sears and Marshalls and some of those other stores have? Those buggies belong TO those stores and those buggies belong IN those stores. Those buggies are not there for people to take them all around the mall as they please. In fact, if you want to get technical about it, if someone takes a buggy out of one of those stores they are stealing. They may think of it as borrowing (Although we all know that 99% of the people never actually take it back; instead they dump it somewhere a mile away from the store it belongs to), but it’s not borrowing. They’re taking store property, for which they have not paid, out of the store; that’s stealing, pure and simple.

Yes, the buggy will probably, hopefully, eventually end up back in the store, but as I see it walking out into the mall with a store’s buggy is almost as bad as shoplifting and leaving the store with stolen product, especially since you would not believe what those buggies cost and how much money the stores have to spend sending employees all over the mall to track down the things. You want to know why prices are so high? Well…them buggies that wander the mall, they iz one reason.

And on top of that, NO, the other stores do NOT want you walking into their stores with buggies. If you’re one of the few who actually ask (Very few - I’ve only heard one person ask in my store), of course the people in the store are going to tell you it’s okay. But since I’m being frank… They’re almost definitely lying and are not happy about it, but they’re not stupid. They’re not about to risk making you angry.

There. That’s off my chest.

Celebrating Jesus!
Tammy C

Compliments of ICanHasCheezburger.com

Enter the ICHC online Poker Cats Contest!

Celebrating Jesus!
Tammy C

I like words.

I like it when words are used well.

I dislike it when words are abused.

Take "incredible," for instance. I just finished cleaning my email inbox. We’re talking SPAM here, and I lost track of the number of times an emailed ad encouraged me to check out their "incredible offer" or some "incredible product."

WHY? Why would I bother looking at an offer when you’re telling me in advance that I won’t believe it? Why would I waste my time on a product that is completely unbelievable?

I know why they use the word, but it irks. It particularly irks when people use it in reference to God and/or the things He does. Our purpose as Christians is to try to help others believe in Him, yes? So why do we say, when someone is giving a praise report, "That’s incredible!"?!

:::snorting:::: It makes me think of a certain line from Princess Bride.
"You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means."

Celebrating Jesus!
Tammy C

…if you are an observer of people.

Not that I am, usually, but I’ve had plenty of opportunity lately. Of the hundreds of customers that come through the store in a day, the vast majority are an absolute joy to serve. I mean really, as a whole our customers tend to have a great sense of humor, be courteous and friendly, remember you from one visit to the next (That is rare in any environment!) and they smile a lot. They’re a huge reason why I enjoy my job as much as I do. They’re the main reason I enjoy my job as much as I do; I’d say we probably have the best clientele there is.

And then there are a few who, for whatever reason, do things that make the retailer’s job harder. I’ve noticed it more since the semi-annual sale has been going on. I don’t know if some people behave differently at big sales or if big sales attract a different group of people, or what, but man…

Why do some people think that if it’s on a sale table they have every right to open it up and try it? And not just try it even… Take one lady yesterday, for instance. She picked up a tube of hand cream that was on the 75% off table, opened it, tried it, decided she liked it, and then put that one down so that she could buy one that had never been opened. HUH?! Did I say something to her? Uh…no… If anyone ever excuses this type of behavior with, "Well, the sales person saw me do it and didn’t say anything," tell them, "That’s because she wanted to keep her job." I mean, the customer is always right…right?

And then there are those who don’t necessarily try things, but they do unscrew or pop open the caps so they can smell them. Hey, I’m not saying don’t do it; I do this myself with a scent I’ve never smelled. (Note: I will not break a seal; I only open and sniff if it’s not sealed up.) Unfortunately, not everyone is overly careful about making sure the caps are back on or closed properly. Oh the mess I had to clean up yesterday! And if luck is really on our side it’s another customer, possibly an angry customer who just touched the icky goo, who finds it. Fortunately for both me and the store, the customer who found the horrible mess I had to clean up yesterday was most gracious about it.

Enough about my job. People might think I’m being critical of it or our customers, and believe me I’m not. Like I said earlier, I love our customers and think we have the best ones anywhere.

But the problem exists and I can’t help but wonder if people honestly believe such behavior is acceptable (Like my last post. Do these parents REALLY believe it’s okay to cuss at their young children?!) and need to be told otherwise or if they know full well what they’re doing and don’t give a flip because the whole world revolves around them.

Ouch.. Okay, you may meow at me. That was a little bit catty.

There’s a particular chain that I hardly shop at anymore. I like their merchandise and I really appreciate their prices. What I don’t appreciate is that unless you follow the manager in first thing in the morning you cannot walk into one of their stores without seeing it totally junked up. And it is NOT the store employees’ fault. I’ve watched. I’ve watched associates work their backsides off trying to recover (Clean up and put things back where they go) even as I watched customers dump stuff all over the place right behind them. I don’t know, maybe these people dump their clothes all over the floor at home and this store feels like a second home to them?

Anyway, the chain is great, but a huge percentage of the chain’s customers make me never want to go there. Of course, those customers probably like that; there’s more space for them to dump stuff because I’m not there and more stuff for them to dig through and dump because I’ve not bought it. Still, it’s a shame that the store has to lose out on customers like me because of customers like them. That’s one retailer that’s caught between the proverbial rock and hard place and what are they to do about it?

But, like I said, most people are wonderful. I meet the nicest people while out shopping, and that’s the honest truth. I meet many of those same nicest people while working at the store, and I enjoy spending a few moments with them while they shop. When I put in this job application back in…September maybe? I did it strictly because the sign said, "Holiday Help Needed." I wouldn’t have even considered the possibility of committing myself to anything long-term. Now that I’ve seen how much fun I have working here, a long-term commitment is looking better all the time.

Oh, by the way. Do you remember a post I made a week or so back, about the little boy who disappeared while his family was in the store? We had a similar incident yesterday. I was stocking a shelf when I suddenly heard a mother desperately calling for her daughter as she walked quickly through the store. Fortunately, I remembered where my manager had found the other little boy, and sure enough the girl had headed in a similar direction. She was in one of the store windows, hiding from her mother.

We’ve really got to train our children to say close to us, and keep a close eye on them at the same time. Children get away from their parents a lot more often than people realize and, like I said in that earlier post, it only takes a few seconds for a child to get hurt or worse.

Celebrating Jesus!
Tammy C

Okay, if I weren’t so tired there’s an issue I could get really burned up over. It’s something I’ve been noticing more and more lately and it…

Yeah, I could be really steaming right now, dealing with rising blood pressure and the whole works.

The first time it happened, I thought, "That mother’s insane!"

But then it happened again.

And then it happened again.

And…

All right. I’m getting more torked as I think about this, so I’ll warn you right now that I’m going to be rude and make some people mad, but I’m fed up to here ::::drawing line at throat:::: with this.

I understand that huge numbers of Americans, people over the age of 18 though sometimes I wonder if you could really call them adults, have limited vocabularies, vocabularies that consist primarily of four-letter-words. I find few things as… :::playing nice:::: …annoying… as having to endure the foul and filthy language that seems to have permeated the United States. I better not talk to you about Jesus, but oh you can fill every sentence with words of four letters, language that is custom designed to offend people like me (And I’m not just referring to "me the Christian" here), and that’s called free speech!

But people, I GET REALLY STEAMED when I hear AN ADULT CUSS OUT A CHILD! It happened today at work and… I try to be the very best possible employee, to always represent the company the way it wants to be represented, but when the mother standing beside me turned to little Susie (Who could not possibly be over 3 or 4 years old. And no, Susie is not her name.) and said, "______ Susie, what the ______ are you doing?!" it took all the self-control I had to bite my tongue and not say a word.

My grandmother would say this country is going to hell in a handbasket. I used to laugh at such expressions, but now I sometimes wonder.

Celebrating Jesus (in the midst of insanity)!
Tammy C

I’d best keep this short, though, because the exhaustion is showing up in serious typos.

I put in a very long day today at the Bath & Body Works job. Have I mentioned lately that I’m loving it? I…

Okay, I’m going to try to be brief… I’m determined to, and I really do need to, because I just realized that it’s actually already tomorrow (Meaning I’m typing this on "Friday night," but it’s after midnight.) and I really need to get to bed.

[sigh] I’ve typed and retyped this how many times? I can’t decide how to say what I want to say.

Okay, maybe this will work.

I was raised in retail. By the time I was in 6th grade, our family had an established sporting goods store and my sister and I were active in it from the very beginning. As a result, I genuinely love working with people in a retail environment, particularly in an environment filled with products I believe in. I don’t walk into the store with the attitude that it’s another day to put in hours to earn a paycheck and "thank God my shift is almost over." I’m not saying the other employees have this attitude, mind; I’m just saying that in the past ten years or so it’s seemed to me that most people who work in retail stores…well… Yeah, most seem to. Either that or they really flat out don’t understand what customer service is all about.

Egads, but that sounds…

I should know better than try to do this when I’m completely wiped out.

Okay, for years I’ve been threatening to rejoin the retail sales force so that I can "show these young people what customer service is really all about." You know what I’m talking about, don’t you? Most of us have an area in which we feel confident and when we find that large numbers of people don’t perform the way we feel they ought to in that area we want to sit them down and give them lessons.

Then again, maybe it’s just me, and maybe I’m just an egotist who is really picky about customer service and wants, as the customer, to be served (not harassed) instead of ignored, which is what seems to happen in most stores.

Yeah, you knew this wouldn’t be short. Who knows? Tomorrow…later "today"… I may well come in, read it, decide it’s complete idiocy, and delete the whole thing.

Anyway, so my bluff got called in a sense and I ended up back in the retail world, though I’m hardly offering lessons, and I think I’m driving these younger girls nuts. Some of them really don’t understand that I am genuinely having fun, that I love working with the customers, in a sense being each customer’s friend for a few minutes out of their lives and helping make their holiday shopping just a little easier. Maybe a few of them get the fact that to me it’s not just a job, but something I really get a charge out of and that yes, I have this smile on my face because I’m genuinely happy - though by gum even if I’m not happy I’ll do my best to make the smile stay there because being happy is part of my responsibility as a sales person.

Ahhhh…. phooey. I’m not making any sense. It’s time to shut up.

For those who are hard at it, try to enjoy your last few days of Christmas shopping. You certainly have my wishes that you will!

Celebrating Jesus!
Tammy C

It seems like every year I’m reminded that there are a few people out there who refuse to celebrate Christmas because "We all know it’s not really Jesus’ birthday."

So?

I know people have other arguments against celebrating Christmas, including the thing about the timing being based on adapting a pagan holiday. I won’t go into all of that, other than to say that it doesn’t strike me at all odd that early Christians would walk in love enough that they would want to make things easier on a people who were turning their backs on everything they’d always known. Plus, I am of the opinion that every day is the Lord’s. But the birthday thing…

I mean… Come ON. If someone refuses to celebrate Christmas simply because they know Jesus wasn’t born on December 25th, then that person would insist that anyone born on February 29th should only be allowed to celebrate their birthday every four years, right?

Those Leap Year "babies" who are in their 40s and up might appreciate that, but something tells me Jesus isn’t too very bothered by dates.

Celebrating Jesus!
Tammy C

PS: Yep, I’m posting yet another reminder. There’s a Good Company CD sitting here waiting for one lucky commenter. I’ve got hundreds of readers and yet hardly any posters; I’m determined to draw some of you out of the woodwork. LOL! On Saturday, I’ll draw the name from among those who posted this week from Saturday through Friday.

Did the entry title throw you? How Homework is Hurting Our Family is an article that was written by Jeff Opdyke and published in the Wall Street Journal Online on September 30th. It raises some valid points about system schools and homework, things I’d like to look at before asking a question of my own. His opening sentence is, "I hate school!" and, by the time you read the whole article, you’ll understand why.

What you won’t understand, if you’re a homeschooler, is why the man doesn’t walk away from the system and start homeschooling in truth. Practically speaking, it’s what he’s already doing anyway and most of us could tell him that he’ll have a whole lot less stress if he’ll take the plunge. Anyway…

Man, it’s hard selecting snippets to paste for comment. The whole article is worth reading. 

No, it’s that the volume of homework and tests that fill his docket is, in a word, ridiculous.

I’m not sure when it happened, but at some point U.S. schools decided that if you can’t teach ‘em, test ‘em…or pile on more homework.

I hardly know what to say here. I blame a lot of this on "No Child Left Behind," which I consider to be one of the worst things that has ever happened to education in this country. We are now so obsessed with testing that teachers spend the majority of the teaching time they do have (less than you think) on test taking skills rather than true academic education. And this isn’t just me talking; this is me repeating what school teachers have been telling me for years.

When I started homeschooling our oldest in first grade back in 1990, I felt like I was failing somewhere because on our fullest days academics never took more than an hour and a half, tops. Then I talked to a couple of elementary teacher friends and they assured me that they probably had no more than about an hour and a half of true teaching time in any given day. That sounds odd, but one of them explained that the largest part of her day was spent on activities like lining up for class changes and monologue like "Okay, everyone get your pencils out…. Come on. You need your pencils for this. No, Johnny, you cannot throw paperwads in class. Now get your pencils out."

My point is that even 17 years ago teachers had less teaching time available to them than the average parent realized. Now they don’t even have that, because in spite of what "they" say about not teaching to the test, it’s a fact that teachers are required by their administrations to teach their students how to take those blasted achievement tests no matter what - even if it means they have no time available to teach vital things like basic reading skills. Again, while I’m not citing studies here, I am sharing what actual, working teachers have told me. My step-mother, in fact, left the teaching world completely behind over this very issue.

She had already retired, but had taken a long-term substitute position and had a class containing multiple children who honest-to-goodness could not read at grade level. She also had three (3!) shrink-wrapped phonics programs sitting in her classroom. When she asked the principal if she could unwrap one and teach those children to read, she was informed that she didn’t have time for it because she had to get them ready for….I think at that time the state’s test was called TAAS. Someone tell me how a child is supposed to properly handle a grade-level achievement test when he’s not reading at grade level. Please?

Oh boy, this could go very long and I’m nowhere near reaching my point. Bottom line: He’s right. The school system has obviously decided (whether it will admit it or not) that it can’t do its job, so it’s dumping as much of that job as possible on the parents.

And to what end? Maybe I’m missing something, but when did schools determine that the best place for kids to learn math, science and English is at their own kitchen table?

I had to laugh over this one. I mean, think about it. The NEA hates us homeschoolers, but what he says here really is indicative of the message all of these extra homework assignments are giving out.

And of course we homeschoolers know that the best place for most kids to learn is in their own homes.

It turns out he’s stressed out. He told Amy that he wishes he could do better. But he already wakes up on school days between 4 a.m. and 5 a.m., panicked that he doesn’t know the material he has already studied. He wakes up Amy to help him go over his notes one more time. He studies in the car on the way to school. Some nights he’s up past 10 p.m., writing, reading or memorizing. He spends parts of many weekends reading and doing projects.

I’m going to force myself to stop right here, because it is a great place to bring in my ultimate point and because you really do need to read the whole article for yourself. And take time to watch the video of the author and his wife discussing the issue. It’s really sad, especially when you realize that the wife seems to feel like perhaps this is "normal" and they need to simply learn how to deal with it, how to manage their time better or whatever.

Anyway…

My point is this. In my not-at-all humble opinion, what we’re seeing here is clear evidence of something that should have been apparent for a long time.

Here in the U.S. we have  a serious problem with overwork. We live in a world where families are challenged, in part, by spouses/parents who can’t leave work at work. They put in their eight hours and then put in overtime. They bring work home and ignore their families in the evenings while they finish up so they don’t start tomorrow "behind." We have people who are literally DYING from the stress of overwork in this nation and we wonder why it’s happening.

I am convinced that it’s at least in part because we train our children, from young ages, to understand that this is the right way of doing things. It is right for your employer to demand that you work overtime. (Hey, that’s exactly what the schools and cooperative parents are doing!) It is right for you to have to bring work home. It is right for you to have to work on the weekends. It is right for you to over schedule your life to such an extent that you wind up taking medication for the stress…

Oh, did I fail to mention that? Check it out.

Some have felt compelled to put their elementary-age kids on medication for anxiety to cope with the stress of so much schoolwork.

HELLO!!!!!

We Americans over schedule and over stress our kids to such an extent that some resort to drugs for relief and we don’t realize that something is WRONG? No wonder we’re a nation of overweight (food is a drug), unfit (Who has time for exercise?!), drugged adults. An athlete trains hard to reach his good goals and we train our kids hard so that they can reach this "goal."

What a goal to reach for!

Okay, the soapbox is going back under the desk for now.

Celebrating Jesus!

Tammy C